Daily InspirationWhen you are with another person, if your focus is primarily on what they want and feel, you may be trying to control how they feel about you. Today, also attend to what you want, and notice how you feel. It is NOT selfish to take responsibility for your own feelings and needs - it is self-responsible. By Dr. Margaret Paul
Jell-o and other answers to spiritual questionsBy Suzi Korsak
September 03, 2012
Why am I here? was the question and my guidance gave me the answer of Jell-o....together let's allow humor into our process that we might keep our hearts open to the deeper lessons.
Why am I here?
I of course found myself laughing in the middle of this exercise. I find myself laughing often when I open to my guidance's answers to my questions...this was no different. Jell-O? I asked "am I here to make Jell-O? eat Jell-O????" What could be the message of Jell-O? or was I just hungry? I am the question girl for sure, always wanting to know "why". I allowed the space of a week to allow the answers to come. ...perhaps not because it would take that long, but more because I was trying to control the answer.
The answer that arrived was that my life in its formlessness is like Jell-O. Jell-O becomes the form in which you place it, as does intention and thought form our moments. Without intention there is no form, no decisions, no experience. However, my guidance said, since you experience form, you are experiencing your intentions in each and every minute with or without them being in your awareness. "Wow!" I thought...and then had a felt sense of this truth. It isn't just my thoughts that create my experience, but the intention behind each one I choose. Am I open to learning? Am I seeking kindness over attempting to control outcomes and others?
If indeed my life is formless without my choices....I can change my life by becoming aware that it is my intentions, because whether I am aware in the present moment making conscious choices or reacting to the world around me...I am the one choosing the intention, moment by moment. Gary Zukav states in Seat of the Soul "At each moment you choose the intentions that will shape your experiences and those things upon which you will focus your attention. These choices affect your evolutionary process. This is so for each person. If you choose unconsciously, you evolve unconsciously. If you choose consciously, you evolve consciously."
This can also be seen and felt as the energy behind my choices. Byron Katie said in an interview on The Leading Edge "Until we take our own minds back and question what we are believing for ourselves, we are lost lambs and our lives become very confusing and painful for us." If I am feeling stuck, confused or anxious...I can move from lost by asking myself "What am I saying or believing that is causing this feeling?" This is Step 3 of the Inner Bonding process. This awareness that I am creating my experience allows me to move from stuck to the understanding of my current experience.
This powerful six-step Inner Bonding process of inquiry and exploration allow us not only to understand our current form (experience) but also a pathway to conscious creation of our form (experience). Jell-O is a perfect analogy as I begin with substance and it is my intent that creates my experience. I begin with checking in to see what I am feeling or experiencing. This allows me to explore unconscious intent. I often have beliefs that have been unconscious but still a part of my life experience. By moving into my body and Step 1: Tuning into your feelings, I can begin to notice if there is any discordance in my feelings. If there is a sense of anything but peace, I notice what is seeking my awareness. I move into Step 2: Choose a compassionate intention to learn. This intention alone is paramount to the process. I need to know that I want to be aware of the other intentions, beliefs and thoughts that have created this present moment. I then move to Step 3: Dialogue with Inner Child and Wounded Self, in this step I can ask the question "what am I doing or saying....or perhaps believing that is causing this feeling?"
Step 3 allows me to begin to have awareness about intention. My thoughts and beliefs are the framework of my feelings. If my intention is to be certain, I may seek to prove my thoughts correct....be in an intention to control others because I think certainty and control keep me feeling safe. If my intention is growth and learning I may be open to hearing other people's thoughts in a way that I couldn't hear when I was closed. The other person in the conversation has the very same thoughts, but the experience of their thoughts is framed by my own intention. This lets me know it has less to do with what someone believes or says that causes my feelings....but my intention creates most of my experience. This is not to say intention is equal to an opinion. Intention is just the energy behind my end of the exchange of thoughts. Am I open to learning or am I trying to prove my point....control what they think?
Dr. Margaret Paul explained this in an inspiration recently.... "It is not what we do or what we say in a moment that defines us in that moment, but rather the energy (intention) with which we speak and do. Regardless of the words, (the feeling of the) energy reveals our intent." I added the words within the parentheses for emphasis of this very important aspect of the process. It is not always the words we use but the energy (intention) behind the delivery. I watched a great example of this within a Tony Robbins video in which he spoke the words "I love you" with varying energies behind them. In one he is sarcastic, another annoyed, another confused and another deep heartfelt emotion....each with their own physiology, facial expressions and energy behind them. It is not only the words, but asking yourself "what do I really really want out of this exchange?" This question will also reveal your intention. Am I wanting to be right? Am I wanting to learn? Am I wanting someone to change or understand me? Am I afraid to lose?....."what do I really really want?" will let you know.
When the answer comes....and it will....how does the answer feel in your body? Do you feel tense or relaxed? Do you feel frustrated or peaceful? The tension and frustration are information you may be trying to control something outside of yourself. A relaxed feeling is one of openness to what is....a way of opening to learning something new. In that place we can ask the next question "What would be loving to me? Kind to me?" The intention is the doorway to each experience. Perhaps using the Jell-O metaphor will help you become aware of your part in forming your experience, and be willing to explore your intentions in a more conscious way.
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