Daily InspirationNotice whether or not you are willing to lose yourself rather than risk losing others. Do you say yes to things you don't want to do in the hope of controlling how others feel about you? Do you compromise yourself in any way out of fear of disapproval? Notice how you feel when you are willing to lose yourself rather than risk losing others. By Dr. Margaret Paul
"Inner Bonding has improved our relationship and our parenting, by giving each of us the tools to recognize, understand, and move beyond power struggles. As a result, we are each able to stay in a deeply loving place more and more continuously, and we bounce back much quicker if either or both of us goes into a wounded place. It's great that we both practice IB as we can get feedback from each other and can enjoy deep learning and spiritual growth together."
Emily Agnew and Duke Duchscherer
"I love the study and am learning so much and only wish I had learned it earlier. Maybe I wouldn't be going through being divorced by my husband of 32 years. I so wish they taught about relationships all through school."
Inner Bonding has provided us with the tools to take responsibility for our own feelings, thoughts and behaviors instead of blaming each other for causing our feelings.
We both have learned how to have a deeper relationship with God which provides us with the strength to take loving care of ourselves. This allows us to be filled with love to share with one another instead of trying to get love from one another. We no longer depend on the other person to make us happy, as we now realize we create our own happiness.
Our communication has greatly improved because we have learned to choose the intent to learn when in conflict and not engage in unproductive conversation. For example, we have reduced blaming, explaining, and trying to get the other person to see our point of view. Inner Bonding has helped us to be more present with ourselves, which in turn, allows us to be more present in the relationship.
Inner Bonding has helped us to find a healthy balance between caring for ourselves and caring for each other. We are more aware of when we are trying to control in the relationship and stop and realize our only control is over ourselves. We have learned the importance of choosing to notice the positives in each other and our relationship.
Inner Bonding has helped us to seek to understand each other, agree to disagree, and discuss hot topics when both of us are open. This preserves our energy and reduces unnecessary frustration in our relationship.
We are so grateful that we have the Inner Bonding process in our lives. Inner Bonding has helped us to have more love, freedom and joy in all of our relationships.
Kelly and Jeff James
"By learning to take personal responsibility for our own “stuff,” we are able to enjoy the true essence of one another. Our love continues to retain the passion, intimacy, and playfulness that we shared when we first met."
Jeff and Elaine
"I figured out, being a trauma survivor, that if I was ever to recover from my eating disorder I would have to take very good care of that little girl that I once was. I was going to have to tell her that I would always be there for her and I was going to take good care of her. Today… I don't feed my little girl sugar or flour. I only give her water, proteins, vegetables, starch and oil/seeds. I exercise 5-6 times/wk doing aerobics on my rebounder. My little girl is happy that I am taking good care of her and feels loved by the good parent she now has. I learned from Inner Bonding that I needed to bond with the little girl inside because my mother did not bond with me. I learned to go to my real source of love which is God who provides spiritual guidance to me. I asked God to be my mother and father. God guides me as I grow and develop my relationship with him. I have lost 13 pounds in the past 7 weeks."
"I'm 63 years old and was obsessed with dieting from the age of 19. When in my 30s I realized that diets don't work, I searched for better answers. I found some help through OA and a number of very good books and authors. For the last several years, I've worked with a therapist who is dedicated to the Overcoming Overeating approach, which I have found very helpful. I've become much more gentle to myself.
"Having thoroughly examined many approaches to my addictions, I believe that your words are beginning to put in place some critical missing pieces. The concepts of self-abandonment and self-love that you delineate really speak to me."
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- FREE monthly Podcasts by Dr. Margaret Paul for Platinum members - in-depth Inner Bonding learning. (value $39.95 - which makes the membership almost free!) Some of the topics include:
- How to heal sexual problems
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- Without learning how to love yourself, the anxiety, depression, and empty
hole inside you will continue to grow, no matter how much sex you have, food
you eat, drugs you take, alcohol you drink, money you make, success you
achieve, attention and admiration you receive, or how many things you buy,
children you have, or marriages you have.
- "[After one month on the member site] I just can't believe the improvement in my heart , the lack of anxiety and depression, and i'm just so thankful for this place to come to get nurturance an support and guidance. "
- "I was looking for something to take away the emptiness I felt inside. I have found it. It has helped me so much in my life and I am looking forward going deeper and deeper into it."
- "Bless you and Dr. Erika for Inner Bonding! I feel as if I have found a process that will truly help me to heal, after decades of therapy, self-help, 12-Step programs, medication, etc. The 12-Step programs are wonderful, and the medicines are a means, not an end. The Inner Bonding, I feel, is a key to healing."
- Without learning how to manage your own feelings, the power struggles, arguments, disconnection and distance with your spouse, children, friends and co-workers will continue to get worse and worse.
- "I wish everyone on the planet could understand the value of this site. It is the best thing that has ever happened in my life. I am so very grateful it exists and to the people who run the programs. Thank you very much."
- "The value I've gained since becoming a member is immeasurable. My marriage is improving, I'm a better parent, and I've stopped drinking! I practice IB consistently and it's paying off!"
- Without developing a powerful loving adult self, you
will continue to lose yourself, your relationship, your health, your
aliveness, passion, joy, inner peace, and creativity.
- “After ten years of therapy and countless workshops, I still did not have the sense of self and wholeness I knew I needed for a truly joyful life. Since I had tried everything, I had no idea how to proceed. Inner Bonding gave me the precious missing pieces of an “inner bond” – an internal system that is at last in place and joyfully intact.”
- "With IB I find not only myself healing but my own kids are daily becoming happier and healthier. How grateful can a person be for that? I find the daily support of the website extremely important."
- Without healing your wounded self, you will continue to be manipulated and controlled by others, and continue to experience guilt, shame, and emotional abuse.
- "I'm grateful for the results i am already seeing in and around me. My relationships with people are changing--for the (much) better. I'm truly grateful for the warmth, honesty, insight, intelligence, and intentions of Margaret and crew, and every one of you lovely Inner Bonders."
- Without deep healing, the abundance available to you through the Law of Attraction will likely continue to elude you.
- "I'm wondering how I've lived so long without it. I can't tell you how valuable I believe this site is. I truly believe it is in the top ten significant contributions to the planet.
- Without developing your personal spiritual connection, momentary pleasure is all you will ever experience - never true joy. Without full access to your spiritual guidance, what you have right now is likely as good as it gets.
- "I think your Inner Bonding work is one of the most significant contributions to this planet I have ever seen. People can heal, love and live life as happy whole spiritual beings. I thank you from the bottom of my heart for all your work."