Call: 888-6InnerBond (888-646-6372)
 



 
 



Daily Inspiration

Are you willing to tell the total truth about yourself, even in the face of fear or loss of love from another? Love does not attempt to manipulate a loved one with niceness, diplomacy, white lies, explanations, or complaints to avoid their anger, disapproval, or loss of the relationship. These tactics arise from fear, and since love and fear do not coexist in the same moment, it is impossible to lie about ourselves when we approach the world with an open heart.

By


Time for Connection

By Dr. Margaret Paul
December 31, 2006



Your relationship with yourself and your partner will always suffer and the wonder and passion of life will pass you by if you do not schedule time to connect.



Gretta and David fell deeply in love in their mid 50's. They were both astounded at the level of passion they experienced.

Time for ConnectionAt the beginning of their relationship, nothing got in the way of their time together - not chores, children, work, friends or "stuff". Nothing was more important than their time together.

However, when they got married and started living together, their passion seemed to fall by the wayside. Sometimes they didn't make love for weeks at a time. They called me for a session to see what was wrong.

Half way into the session, David hit the nail on the head. "We never seem to have time for each other anymore."

 

Getting "Stuff" Done Instead of Connecting

"What are you doing with your time now?" I asked. "Getting stuff done," they answered.

"Why is getting the stuff done more important than time together?" I asked.

As we explored this question, both Gretta and David discovered that they had been brought up with a strong work ethic: "Get everything done before relaxing." "Work before play." What they didn't realize was that their "doing" was in the way of their "being." Without having time to be, they had no emotional and spiritual connection with each other or with themselves. Without their connection, there was no desire to express themselves sexually, especially for Gretta. Gretta complained that she didn't feel connected with David and didn't enjoy sex without connection, yet she made no room in her day for the time to connect.

 

Planning Time To Connect

How many of you plan time for yourself to connect with yourself and with your spiritual guidance? How many of you plan time to connect with your partner or others in your life?

Creating time to connect with yourself means setting aside time each day to just be with yourself. When you plan this quiet time - to pray, meditate, do an Inner Bonding process - you create the space to connect with Spirit as well. It is when you are quiet and in the moment with yourself that you will hear the voice of your spiritual guidance.

Creating time to connect with each other means planning time to do nothing with each other, as well as planning fun time together. It means sitting together on the patio and watching the sunset. It means having a cup of tea together before going to work. It means watching a video together, or taking a walk. It means getting into bed way before bedtime to cuddle and share your day with each other. It means getting up early enough to share your dreams with each other. It means planning a date night together at least once a week.

Your relationship with yourself and your partner will always suffer if you do not plan time to connect. This is not a luxury - something you do only after you've finished everything. This is a necessity for your own health and well-being as well as the health and well-being of your relationship. You will never finish everything you need to do. There will always be "stuff." But the wonder and passion of life will pass you by if you do not schedule in time to connect. This time needs to be as important as the time you take to eat, sleep and work. It is only when you see it as essential to your well-being will you make it a very high priority in your life.

Gretta and David decided to set aside a half hour each day to sit on their patio and do nothing with each other. In addition, they each decided to set aside another half hour - when they were usually doing stuff - to connect with themselves. It didn't take long for the passion to come back into their relationship.

Join Dr. Margaret Paul for her 30-Day at-home Relationships Course: "Loving Relationships: A 30-Day Experience with Dr. Margaret Paul - For people who are partnered and people who want to be partnered."

Join IBVillage to connect with others and receive compassionate help and support for learning to love yourself.



Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs
CC BY-NC-ND


Send this article to a friend    Print this article    Bookmarked 5 time(s)
Bookmark and Share    Share with Del.icio.us    submit 'Time for Connection' to digg Share with Digg    Share with StumbleUpon
There are no videos, Click to add one to the gallery!
There is no audio, Click to add audio to the gallery!
There are no pictures, Click to add one to the gallery!

Comments


More Help

Looking for help with Time for Connection?

Search for solutions on Time for Connection within the InnerBonding.com website using Google's Site Search.

Click to Share
Facebook Digg it MySpace Twitter Stumbleupon Windows Live Yahoo! My Web Linked in