Daily InspirationThe avoidance of loneliness, heartbreak and helplessness over others and outcomes is often at the root of controlling, compliant, resistant or addictive behavior. It is helpful to learn to name the feeling we are trying to avoid. When we name it, we can allow it, acknowledge it, embrace it, bring love and compassion to it, and then release it to Spirit. Denying it keeps us stuck. Naming it allows us to manage it, release it and take loving action in our own behalf. By Dr. Margaret Paul
“I Feel Overwhelmed”By Dr. Margaret Paul
January 23, 2012
When you feel overwhelmed, do you believe that it is about external circumstances? Discover why this might not be true.
I often hear from my clients that they feel overwhelmed. Generally, feeling overwhelmed means one of three things:
- Overwhelmed by their feelings
- Overwhelmed by time pressures
- Overwhelmed by how to do things ‘right’
The feeling of overwhelm is generally caused by how we are treating ourselves and what we are telling ourselves.
In my Skype session with Peter, he told me at the beginning of the session that he felt overwhelmed.
“Peter, please breathe into your feeling of overwhelm and get present with it…….do you want responsibility for being the one causing this feeling?”
“Yes, but I don’t think I’m the cause. I think it’s because I have so much to do and I don’t have the time to get everything done.”
“Is this what you are telling yourself, which is causing you to feel overwhelmed?”
“Yes, but it’s true.”
“Peter, lets go a little deeper with what you are telling yourself. What are you telling yourself will happen if you don’t get everything done?”
“People will be upset with me.”
“And what does it mean if they are upset with you?”
“It means that I’m not good enough.”
“How do you think your children would feel if you said to them, “You have all this to do and not enough time to do it, and if you don’t get it done people will be upset with you, and their upset means that you are not good enough, so get to work.”
“I would never say that to my children.”
“But this is what you are telling yourself – the little boy within who is your feeling self. So of course he feels overwhelmed, just as your children would feel if you said this to them. Peter, please open to your higher self and ask what the truth is.”
“……………My higher self is saying that I always manage to get things done and that putting pressure on myself just makes it harder. And he says that I am a loving soul – and that is the basis of my worth, not whether I get things done or whether or not people are upset with me.”
“So, while it may be true that you have a lot to get done, everything else you have been telling yourself is not true – and this is what is causing your overwhelm. Ask you higher self what else you can say to yourself that will release the overwhelm.”
“My little boy inside needs to know that I will love him even if we don’t get everything done. I’m telling him that right now, and he feels so much better!”
Janna was feeling overwhelmed by her feelings of loneliness and heartbreak after her boyfriend broke up with her; she had been over-eating and eating junk to numb the feelings.
“Janna, breathe into these feelings and see if you can get totally present with them……now focus in your heart and invite into your heart compassion for these feelings – kindness, gentleness, caring. Imagine that you are sitting with your hurting child within, embracing her with deep compassion. Just keep being fully present with these very painful feelings with compassion, until you feel ready to release them to Spirit.”
It only took about five minutes before Janna felt ready to let the feelings move through her. Each time the painful feelings came up, Janna embraced them with compassion and allowed them to move through her rather than getting stuck in her. Her desire to over-eat vanished, as she no longer felt overwhelmed.
I hope the next time you feel overwhelmed, you fully embrace this feeling with compassion, so that you can either learn about what the overwhelm might be telling you, or you can manage the underlying painful feelings with deep kindness toward yourself.
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