Call: 888-6InnerBond (888-646-6372)


Daily Inspiration

When your body becomes your temple and you treat each cell with loving kindness, you will begin to know that each living thing upon this planet is but a cell of the greater Oneness. When you experience this Oneness, you will treat each living thing and the planet itself with the same loving kindness as you treat each cell of your body.


The Happiness Choice

By Dr. Margaret Paul
November 29, 2010

Do you know what major choice you can make that creates either happiness or misery? Discover that choice in this article!

"Our ultimate freedom is the right and power to decide how anybody or anything outside ourselves will affect us."

--Stephen R. Covey,
 Author and Speaker

This is a powerful freedom. And, from my point of view, another way of putting this is that the ultimate freedom is the right and power to decide our own intent:

  • To protect against pain with our controlling behavior
  • To learn about what is loving to ourselves and others

When our intent is to learn about love, that is when we get to decide how others will affect us.

If my intent is to control how other people feel about me, then if they don't like me, I will be upset. I may feel rejected or unworthy. I've made them responsible for my sense of worth, which then means that I have to try to control how they feel about me by being perfect, being nice, doing things right, saying the right thing, looking right, performing right, and so on. This is a very hard way to live!

When my intent is to be loving to myself, then I don't make others responsible for me sense of worth. Instead, I define my essential worth - not by my looks or performance - but by my essential qualities of compassion, loving kindness, caring, understanding, creativity, perseverance, basic goodness, and so on. I learn to define myself, not by my programmed ego wounded mind, but through the eyes of my higher self. If someone doesn't like me, I don't take this personally, since I accept that I have no control over who they are or how they feel, and it is not loving to me to take their behavior personally.

When my focus is on loving myself and sharing my love with others, I behave in ways that bring me joy. While painful outside events can momentarily affect me, when my intent is to be loving to myself, I quickly move into compassion for my own feelings, bringing in the comfort of Spirit to help me move through the loneliness, heartache, heartbreak, grief, sorrow, or sadness of a situation. 

This all depends on who I give authority to - my personal source of spiritual guidance, or others and events. When I give authority to others and events, then I become a victim of others and circumstances. When I give authority to my personal source of spiritual guidance, I always have access to a source of truth, peace, and joy.

My happiness or misery is my choice, and it depends entirely on my intent - which is my ultimate free-will choice.

The moment my intent is to control that which I cannot control, or that which is unloving toward myself, others, or the planet to control, I will create my misery. Whether I try to control my pain with various addictions to substances or processes, or I try to control my feelings by getting others approval, or I try to control others and outcomes by acting in ways that are not in integrity with that which is loving to myself and others, I will make myself unhappy. Operating from a belief that the end justifies the means will never bring me joy.

The moment my intent is to be loving to myself and others, then I will treat myself, others and the planet in ways that are in alignment with what is in my highest good and the highest good of all. Loving behavior toward myself and others always brings a deep inner sense of joy.

When you choose the intent to learn about loving yourself and others, you move yourself into personal power, integrity, and connection with the Source of wisdom, truth, and joy.


Send this article to a friend    Print this article    Bookmarked 2 time(s)
Bookmark and Share    Share with    submit 'The Happiness Choice' to digg Share with Digg    Share with StumbleUpon
There are no videos, Click to add one to the gallery!
There is no audio, Click to add audio to the gallery!
There are no pictures, Click to add one to the gallery!


Author Comment Date

There are 5 member comments on this article.

Join the Inner Bonding Community to add your comment to articles and see the comments of others...

More Help

Looking for help with The Happiness Choice?

Search for solutions on The Happiness Choice within the website using Google's Site Search.

Click to Share
Facebook Digg it MySpace Twitter Stumbleupon Windows Live Yahoo! My Web Linked in