Daily InspirationToday, focus on telling your truth with the important people in your life - the truth about you and who you are, not about them and who they are. Notice when you want to change the truth or to withhold something. Notice if there is fear of being completely honest with your truth of who you are. What is your fear? By Dr. Margaret Paul
"Very non-threatening - enlightening. I've finally found a way to get to my core and be truly happy. I'm so excited to begin my new life." Rowe Weekend Workshop, 5/06
"I LOVED this week-end Workshop. This is the second one I've taken and I still got a tremendous amount of benefit from this experience. I'm so grateful for this work." L.A. Workshop, 12/06
"I thought it was wonderful. It really helped us focus on specific actions I can take to heal myself. The exercises were helpful." L.A. Weekend Workshop, 11/04
"[The Inner Bonding Workshop] put me back on the path of doing the work and will move me past the 'stuck' place I was in!"
Workshop at Kripalu in MA, July, 1999
"This process is a miracle for me. I have tried my whole life to have a connection with God and not until I found the Inner Bonding process, have I been able to make that connection. This process is helping me get in touch with my truth and honoring my truth without needing validation from others. I am looking forward to a passionate life full of love by connecting to God and bringing that love to myself and letting that love shine."
"Wow, amazing how one weekend can be so impacting! I was called to come, the words aloneness and finding your passion/purpose was the main trigger! On Friday evening I found myself reluctant, thinking I did enough of that 'stuff'. I didn't think it would benefit me! But my intent was to stay until the cake was fully baked, so my interest was staying open and to learn. How wonderful! The process helped me to work out a big junk of frustration, hurt and anxiety. I really got an understanding where my wounded child caused all this and I feel a big amount of freedom and motivation to use the six steps for all other challenges. This process really can help me, will help me to heal my body and soul and to take care of myself in a loving, gentle way! Thank you very much!"
Rowe, MA Workshop, April, 2000
Relationship Success Stories
We Were Headed For Divorce
"The inner bonding work has completely changed my life and my relationship for the better. My husband and I went from a relationship that was surely headed for divorce (or misery) to the most fulfilling and connected relationship I have ever experienced! (More than I ever even imagined was possible.) We are now able to communicate freely and openly about all areas of our life, money, emotions, sex. We both feel free to relate to each other openly without fear of the other's reaction."
--Danielle Koprowski, Roselle, IL
We Move Beyond Power Struggles
"Inner Bonding has improved our relationship and our parenting, by giving each of us the tools to recognize, understand, and move beyond power struggles. As a result, we are each able to stay in a deeply loving place more and more continuously, and we bounce back much quicker if either or both of us goes into a wounded place. It's great that we both practice IB as we can get feedback from each other and can enjoy deep learning and spiritual growth together."
--Emily Agnew and Duke Duchscherer, Rochester, NY
Emotional and Sexual Intimacy Starts With Me
"True emotional intimacy, and especially sexual intimacy for me (I've learned) can only exist when I am open to being my authentic self. Intimacy starts with me. The Inner Bonding work I've done both individually and as a couple has allowed me to recognize the beauty within me, and ultimately, free myself of deep fears which meddled in my relationships for far too long. Eventually, every relationship in my life blossomed and deepened as I continued to grow and learn to act from loving kindness, first with myself, and then with others, allowing me to be available for truly soulful relationships. Thank you Margaret for being a source of light for me to find myself."
We've Retained the Passion we had When we First Met!
"By learning to take personal responsibility for our own 'stuff,' we are able to enjoy the true essence of one another. Our love continues to retain the passion, intimacy, and playfulness that we shared when we first met."
--Jeff and Elaine (Santa Monica, CA)
Move from Codependency Toward Real Intimacy
"By teaching us how to take full responsibility for ourselves in relationship, Inner Bonding helped us move from codependency toward real intimacy. Inner Bonding taught us how to recognize and then own and transform the things we have projected onto each other, whether it be our darkness or our beauty. As a result, we have become freer to explore the depths of who we really are, to share this with each other and to support one another in our healing journey."
--Karen Kral, M.A., LPCC and Mark Lersch, M.A., LPCC
We Feel Free, empowered, and Deeply Loving
"Inner bonding has helped us to love and care for ourselves, so that we share our lives and love from a full and connected place without codependent expectations. We focus on our own highest good and support this in each other. This has allowed us to feel truly free, empowered, deeply loving and supported in our journey together."
--Sylvia Poareo and Sean Davidson
"Inner Bonding saved my life!"
We are Happier Now Than in Those First Exciting Months of Dating
"We so wanted to blame each other for our ills and unhappiness - it was so much easier!! Since we have been doing Inner Bonding, we realized that whatever made us unhappy was ourselves, and that truly taking responsibility for our own lives in every way was the key to a successful relationship. We have become much closer emotionally, sexually, and in every other way. We have acknowledged to one another that we are happier now than we were in those first exciting months of dating."
--Art and Judy Ross
"We got married today!"
We Have a Balance Between Caring For Ourselves and Caring for Each Other
"Inner Bonding has provided us with the tools to take responsibility for our own feelings, thoughts and behaviors instead of blaming each other for causing our feelings.
"We both have learned how to have a deeper relationship with God which provides us with the strength to take loving care of ourselves. This allows us to be filled with love to share with one another instead of trying to get love from one another. We no longer depend on the other person to make us happy, as we now realize we create our own happiness.
"Our communication has greatly improved because we have learned to choose the intent to learn when in conflict and not engage in unproductive conversation. For example, we have reduced blaming, explaining, and trying to get the other person to see our point of view. Inner Bonding has helped us to be more present with ourselves, which in turn, allows us to be more present in the relationship.
"Inner Bonding has helped us to find a healthy balance between caring for ourselves and caring for each other. We are more aware of when we are trying to control in the relationship and stop and realize our only control is over ourselves. We have learned the importance of choosing to notice the positives in each other and our relationship.
"Inner Bonding has helped us to seek to understand each other, agree to disagree, and discuss hot topics when both of us are open. This preserves our energy and reduces unnecessary frustration in our relationship.
"We are so grateful that we have the Inner Bonding process in our lives. Inner Bonding has helped us to have more love, freedom and joy in all of our relationships."
--Kelly and Jeff James
"Before Inner Bonding I felt like a victim."
Personal Success Stories
"Bringing in the spiritual has been life-transforming for me!"
"This is the most important and foundational work that there is."
"I've Overcome Low Self-Esteem"
"My Inner Bonding training has significantly enhanced my daily life. As a result of Inner Bonding I've overcome low self-esteem and self doubt, instead embracing my "self" as a unique, creative and happy person. When I am faced with seemingly difficult circumstances, I dialogue with my inner self and am consistently rewarded with wonderful and insightful paradigms. There seems to be so much inside me to be tapped by simply learning how to connect with that delightful inner self who has so much to say. Comparing my life after Inner Bonding to the life before can be summed up by the song Amazing Grace: 'I was blind but now I see'.
--Rick Fria, Builder, AZ
"I Don't Criticize Myself Anymore."
"Prior to Inner Bonding I was a lifelong caretaker of others. I felt I had to take care of everyone so that they would like me. My connection to Spirit was at best, tenuous, and I felt constantly overburdened. I lacked self-confidence, did not speak up for myself, and was very self-critical. Being very sensitive to the feelings of others, I would take them on, almost subconsciously. I did not know how to take responsibility for my own feelings. The ongoing practice of Inner Bonding and excellent facilitation has changed all that. Owning my own feelings has made such a difference to me. Now I am confident, calm, happy, joyful, and patient with myself, with a strong spiritual connection. I don't criticize myself anymore. I no longer take on others feelings. I speak my truth with family and friends - I don't hold back. I have grown up and become myself and I feel complete now!"
--Anna Forsyth, Edinburgh, UK, Property Developer
"I Could't Handle My Own Life."
"Before Inner Bonding, most days getting out of bed was like pulling myself through the mud. There was not one area of my life I felt I could handle. I was a bad parent, and I had no ability to run a business. I couldn't handle my own life. I was always in fear that the dark cloud of depression might put me out of commission, sometimes for days. Now, because of Inner Bonding, I have peace, joy and connection with others in a way that I have always wanted. I have no fear of "dark cloud" days. I have the tools, a path to joy, a deeper connection. I am strong and grounded, and I know I can handle anything! I have joy in parenting and a deeper relationship with my children. Inner Bonding gave us a life I had only dreamed about!"
-- Suzi Korsak, Merrimack, NH, Commercial real Estate, and owner of an award-winning Crowne Plaza Hotel.
A Treasure Map to Your Authentic Self
"Simply put, Inner Bonding = liberation. The process of IB has become a cornerstone in my journey toward wholeness, it has helped me cultivate a palpable faith that I am always exactly where I need to be...to r-e-l-a-x. IB provides a treasure map to that which often feels like a far away, distant land -- the authentic self. Do your IB work, and joy and an authentic aliveness will beckon you, that's just how it works."
--Mike Moran, LCSW
"No Psychological Insights Would Help"
"I am a woman approaching 50 years. I had been in therapy for 20+ years for depression and PTSD related to issues of childhood physical, sexual and emotional abuse and a life-threatening cancer when I was 13. Although it felt at times like I was making progress, it was never enduring and my ability to function became worse as the years marched on. My spiritual quests to look for answers were also incomplete--neither modality giving me the tools I needed to lead a fulfilling and functioning life. At one point, a few years ago, the depression got so severe that I needed to get admitted to a trauma recovery center. In the summer of 2008, I called on Margaret at the advice of my therapist there and attended an intensive that Fall.
"Margaret didn't need to know my entire history, detail for detail to know that my connection to God and myself was essentially non-existent and that they held the key to my recovery. No psychological insights would help. Since that time, I've done Inner Bonding every day. Every day I try to connect with God and although it was almost impossible most days one year ago, I now have days when I feel connected all day long. It's this aspect of Inner Bonding that has literally saved my life. My connection to God has helped me to have the courage to finally connect with the younger parts of me that were frozen with terror and depression, but acted out most of the time with fury at the external world and myself.
"Today, I am reconnecting with friendships and some family members that I'd lost during those dark years. I am in a new relationship with a man who also wants to learn how to more love himself, me and others. He is raising 2 young boys which will afford me the opportunity to fulfill a dream that with much heartbreak, I thought would go unfulfilled in this life time---to be a mom.
"I recommend Inner Bonding with 100% confidence that it will make a life-transforming difference in your life too."
"Great Results in a Short Time "
"I tried therapy and meditation before but nothing really had a lasting effect in alleviating my suffering.
"Inner bonding goes to the root of the problem, which is caused by our way of thinking in the present and doesn't dwell on analyzing the past, which is often not helpful. The language Dr. Paul uses is simple and easy to understand and anyone can relate to it, because it points to mental images, which we can easily identify with. The articles and the six steps of Inner Bonding are pretty straight-forward and clear. Although not always easy, one can achieve great results in a short time with diligence, practice and good will. The web site also offers a large variety of help and support in the form of articles, podcasts, chat rooms and much more. Dr. Paul and Dr. Chopich are also available to answer personal questions, which are posted for all to read and have been a great inspiration to anyone who is open to learning about being loving."
"No Longer is There Aloneness"
"I've been a member of the Inner Bonding community for 3 years now. It is a wonderful healing place in which to feel support for my Inner Bonding process. Before I came to Inner Bonding, I lived a life full of despair and feeling like I could never make my life work. Because I was ready to learn, it was shown to me how I was causing my own suffering with addiction, blaming others and my own wounded thought processes. With learning how I could enlist the aid of spiritual guidance along with my own intent to learn, I've found so much comfort and relief that my needless suffering could be healed. No longer is there aloneness, because I've got an internal connection I didn't have before Inner Bonding. Dr. Margaret Paul and Dr. Erika Chopich have forever changed my life and thousands of others with this simple, life affirming process."
--Jennifer McCandless, Sacramento,California
"Drenched in shame and depression"
"I've lived my life fearing so much and being drenched in shame and depression. I wanted to live my life from another source, that of openness, joy, and the absence of anxiety. After discovering Inner Bonding, I found an internal language that I really really wanted to speak. And as I am learning it, I am filled with thankfulness and openness and curiosity for this beautiful new world that is revealing itself to me, both inside and outside."
"Now I know the difference between control and love!"